Sunday, January 28, 2007

encouraging words

i know that this is unusual for me to write within such a short time...but i really wanted to share about my weekend...so this weekend at camp we have one group in...pni...this group comes out to camp every summer and winter...and through my time here i have come to know and cherish various different people in this group...well, i have been struggling with remembering my purpose for being here...i'll be honest, lately i have been going through the motions...doing what i know i need to do but longing for that passion i once had...and throughout this weekend God has used the leaders in this group to encourage and refresh me...God has used this time to show me a glimpse of what He has done through me during my time here...and i was just blown away...i think that many people much like myself have a hard time remembering, let alone seeing the bigger picture...and when we forget about that picture and only see what is right around us day in and day out we miss out on something joyous...something i don't even know how to explain...we can lose our drive to make our part of the picture vibrant and unique...we fall into conforming to what's around us because, let's be honest, it is easier...we don't have to think about it or go against the flow...and just end up floating along...that is where i have been...but God is stirring something within me...something that hasn't been awaken in awhile...i don't know how to put it into words...i don't know if there are words for it...but please be in prayer for me...
again i just wanted to thank you all for your encouragement and prayers as of late too...it has done wonders for my soul...really and truly...thank you sooo much...and my prayer for all of you is that God will encourage and bless you all as much and more than He has used you all to bless me...i hope you all have a wonderful week :)

(side note...i met this pretty great worship leader this weekend...his name is thomas dickerson...we had a nice chat about being filled with Jesus and reaching out to those around us in a non-conforming way...anyways, he has a huge passion for seeking those who don't know Jesus...i mean really know Him personally...and he has been blessed with the opportunity to start off in the music business...it is through a new secular publishing company...but God has some neat things in store for all those involved...it is exciting for him...all this to say, he has a cd coming out soon..."calling all nations"...look for it...i think you will enjoy it.)

Friday, January 26, 2007

neoteny

"And He said: 'I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.'"
Matthew 18:3-4


Neoteny is "the retention of youthful qualities by adults." Qualities like: curiosity, playfulness, eagerness, fearlessness, warmth, energy, open, willing to take risks, hungry for knowledge and experience, courageous, eager to see what the new day brings...Children know no limits...They can do anything...or at least try anything at least once...no hindrances...they are full of creativity and drive...it's amazing...

The sad part about all of this is that these qualities are repressed as they get older...society...the church..."authorities" begin to tell them/us that it is not ok to be unique...it's not productive to be creative...one must conform to the way everyone else does things...looks at things...just because this is what we do...what we know...so we become self-conscience...fearful...timid...we limit ourselves...we limit God...or like Mark Batterson puts it in his book In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day , "we become small people with a small God."

So what do we do??? We must come back to the truth that we have been created to have limitless dreams and imaginations to serve a limitless God with unlimited resources...to believe in this truth...to hold on to it with all one's might...can you even imagine the possibilities of what God will do??? I mean really...I know I struggle with seeing my God in that light sometimes... I allow myself to be limited...I settle with conformity in order to not mess with the status quo...I know I do...so what can I change...I can change my attitude...I must fight the battle everyday, sometimes a hundred times...to not worry about what others will say or think...but to be filled with the Spirit...to focus on what He wants me to do and what He thinks of me and really that is all that matters...

What am I trying to say in all this...well, I guess that as of today I am making it my personal goal and challenge to come back to those childlike qualities I was created with and live my life through them...not being limited...not being afraid of looking foolish in the world's eyes...so please pray for me in this process...I know I can't do this alone.

By the way...I wanted to thank all of you eho responded to my last blog...I was so encouraged by all of you...Truly and deeply...thank you very much :)

Sunday, January 14, 2007

resistance

"Resistance is the derailing force we experience when we attempt any potentially good thing — a painting, an article, a marathon or a marriage. It strikes anyone who hopes to move to a higher plane — in relationships, spirituality, academics, creative work or business," (Stephen Pressfield, The War of Art).

Interesting huh?!? I read this article on boundless.org, talking about getting unstuck and striving for your dreams...and it got me to thinking...what resistance is in my life right now? what am i not pursuing because i feel and/or believe that it cannot be done? the first thing that comes to mind is camp...camp in terms of starting my own camp...starting my own traveling camp...where i go to the groups and serve them where they are at...actually the more that i think about this the more i see how i've let resistance reign in my life...ideally i would be meeting various different people where they are at and striving to love and serve them as God will allow me to. i've been holding back and making excuses...like, i just don't know what to say or do...or i haven't contacted this person in forever, what will they think if i do now, out of the blue? lately i feel as if i have been running on empty...barely able to make through what needs to be done in a day let alone anything extra...i guess that would be the bulk of it...the resistance in my life is the lack of energy and discouragement i feel...lately it has been so bad that i'm not even sure these "dreams" of mine are really worthwhile, in the sense that i am still called to strive after them...part of me is just not sure anymore...so what does one do?

beating resistance...
“It occurs when the boy who has been enchanted in the nursery by stories from the Odyssey buckles down to really learning Greek. It occurs when lovers have gotten married and begin the real task of learning to live together. In every department of life it marks the transition from dreaming aspiration to laborious doing." (C.S. Lewis)

take action...one must do something...anything really...just move...this is where i have been guilty...i haven't taken action in awhile...right now i am still trying to figue out what type of action to take...even if it be small at least it is something to get me moving agian..."an object in motion tends to stay in motion, while and object at rest tends to stay at rest..." that sort of thing...

so i guess in all this i would just be asking for your prayers...pray that i will take action this week...that i will fight resistance even if it is in something small and almost insignificant...it needs to be done...i wish i knew how to be more specific than this...i just don't know right now. i'm sure you all know how that goes :) thanks!

one last thought to leave you all with...
“If you were meant to cure cancer or write a symphony or crack cold fusion and you don’t do it, you not only hurt yourself, even destroy yourself. You hurt your children, you hurt me, you hurt the planet,” Pressfield writes. “You shame the angels who watch over you and you spite God Almighty, who created you and only you with your unique gifts, for the sole purpose of nudging the human race one millimeter further along its path back to God.” (Stephen Pressfield)