where do you hide?

people hurting everywhere i look....but they are trying to hide and mask the pain. some peoples masks are better than others...some hide behind fears...some hide in craziness....some hide out in the open in large groups of people acting like nothing is wrong...some where there hurt as scars on their arms and legs...some are so entrenched in the hurt they can't see a way out of it...some people are hurting so much that everything around them seems hopeless and they give up all together...some people just shut down and shut out life...some make jokes and hide behind sarcasm...how many people ever really deal with the pain and move on in life? how many people just stay hidden behind their facades...afraid of what might happen if they let down the facade...if they face the pain and the hurt...can some people even hide in the guise of getting help? pain and suffering are life's staples...can anyone ever really move past them all? it's just too much to hope for i think sometimes...i don't know...all i know is that i see hurting people all around me...and from this i cannot hide...

Rt. 66...day 4

Today we traveled from Albuquerque, New Mexico to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma...We got back on the ol' Rt. 66 roadway...New Mexico has to be one of the prettiest states we drove through...

As we arrived in Texas...we managed to find the "first/last motel" in Texas...not much to look at anymore...you know I couldn't help the saddenss I felt as we drove through all of these deserted little towns...what this must of been like back in the day...

Today was the day that we hit the mid-way point of Rt. 55. We stopped at the mid-point cafe in Texas....great liitle spot with very friendly people and amazing food!

This is Mid-Point Cafe's signiture pir...made with"ugly" crust...it was absolutely delightful :) If you ever ge to this cafe make sure you save room for sessert it's a must!!

Rt. 66...day 3...detour

Yesterday we ventured off the beaten path of Rt. 66 and drove the Grand Canyon...One of the tope 5 breath-taking things I have ever seen...there isn't a whole lot I can say about what I saw...and the pictures barely do it justice...but I will let the pictures try to tell you what I cannot:

After the Grand Cayon we made our way bk onto Rt. 66 and found probably one of the greatest motels you could ever stay in...who wouldn't want to stay in a teepee...

I mean really...and the vintage cars to top it

off gotta love it :)

After the wigwam motel, we went on a search for a giant jackrabbit with larte white pointy teeth...it took awhile...but we soon found it...


And I tamed it...I ain't afraid of no rascally jackrabbit

:)






So...I hiked around the Grand Cayon...visited the indians...tamed a wild beast...and then paid an expensive toll to see a forest, that's not so much a forest really...but it was still beautiful and well worth the time and money...now you will see a few pictures from the petrified forest and painted desert...enjoy:

Day 3 was a beautiful day!! Too beautiful to put into words...I hope the few pictures I picked out gives you a glimmer of our day yesterday...keep watching the blog...I will post today's events tomorrow...I'm super tired tonight...we drove from Alburuerque, New Mexico to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma today and tomorrow we will be heading to Southern Illinois with more great sites to see. Night :)

Rt. 66...day 2

Route 66...the mother road...what I was hoping for and expecting all along...open road...nothing for miles and miles around :) Today was a much better day of driving. More sites to see...more ground covered...we actually made it out of California!! (Mom didn't like Cali too much...she couldn't wait to be out of there...for me it was mixed...I'm all about making good time and getting plenty of road behind me...but California has been a fairly big chapter in my life, so I was sad to see it go.


Ready to see some of the things I saw along the way from Arcadia to Kingman? Too late...I'm going to show you whether you like it or not:

Wide open spaces...nothing but hot desert for miles and miles. If I ever decide to drive Rt. 66 again remind me to NOT drive it in the dead of summer...with no air conditioner...and a car that likes to overheat (meaning you have to drive a good part of the desert with the heat on)...but that's what memories are made of right?!?

Newbury Springs took my mom and I by surprise...we both did a double take...then a fast U-turn so I could back and take these pictures...It looks like a memorial to the town:

Dedicated to the town that once stood here...Newbury :)

Ambroy - motel, diner, gas station, memorabilia...another little town in the middle of nowhere California...

That's just a bit of what I saw today...can't wait for tomorrow!!!

Rt. 66...here we go...

I'm on my way bk to Illinois...I start school in just a couple of weeks...crazy, huh?!? I decided that if I was going to drive cross country I might as well have fun with it, right? So why not live out one of my dreams and travel via Rt. 66. My mom and I arrived in Santa Monica lasl night @ 5pm...we stopped for dinner and had the most amazing cheesburger, Yum :)

It was officially 6pm when we started driving on Rt. 66...We drove through Santa Monica, Beverly Hills, West Hollywood and Arcadia...4 hours and a stop @ the cheescake factory later we decided to get a hotel and call it quits for the night. I wasn't quite expecting the stop and go and hidden paths of Rt. 66. I was a bit frustrated with the lack of preperation and navigation and signage at the start of the trip...there were deffinately some points we were literally driving around in circles. I saw more of downtown LA than I ever expected to...but at least I get to say that I saw Rodeo Drive and Sunset Blvd. Today we will be making our way to Arizona...Let's see what surprises Rt. 66 holds for us...

broken hearts unite

it amazes me to find out how many people have been affected by sucide. how many people have lost somesone close to them in this fashion? i never realized how prevelant this disease was until more recently. how many people do i come in contact with on a daily basis that have no hope? hopelessness...desperation...pain, oh so much pain...how can one touch all those that are hurting so? Lord you are our Healer...you are our Hope...Lord this pain inside of me is almost more than i can bear and i lean on you. Lord i just don't understand. there are so many questions...

yet we don't always get the answers...but you surround us with people who have felt the same pain...the same questions...the same experiences...you provide comfort in through those people. people who can come up beside you, put their arm around you and tell you: " i know what it feels like i don't understand either, but i'm here for you."

familiar yet foreign

i feel so out of place...i look around me...i know all of this...this is too familiar...i know what i should do...how to act...everything looks just like i left it...but something has changed...something is not quite the same...something is foreign and i am not sure it really belongs...
is it me? or is it the furniture? what's changed? i just can't figure it out...it almost feels like i'm in the twilight zone...you know where everything looks the same on the outside...but something is drastically wrong...its not home.
i feel anxious and concerned...i know how to dress the part...but i don't know what to expect.
how can something so familiar be so foreign? how can something that felt so much like home feel more like an abandoned warehouse? i just don't understand what has happened...i just don't know what to do...

tomorrow

my stomache is churning...i'm feeling anxious...the dread is overwhelming...

i wish i could wish away tomorrow...i wish tomorrw didn't have to happen...i'm not ready for tomorrow...

tomorrow reality hits...tomorrow i have to face what i have been avoiding all week...tomorrow i have to say goodbye...

tomorrow is my cousin's funeral...he was 17 years old...and about week ago he decided to take his own life...

tomorrow makes my worst fears and nightmares more real...tomorrow brings so much pain and sorrow...

my heart aches for the people i will encounter tomorrow...tomorrwo i am not the only one hurting...tomorrow i am not the only one searching

tomorrow there will be no answers...tomorrow there is no promise of understanding...tomorrow just is, tomorrow...

i dread facing the realities of tomorrow...i don't know how to deal with tomorrow...i don't know how to heal from tomorrow...

tomorrow is a day i wish would never be...i wish i could live without tomorrow...i wish i could wish tomorrow away...